K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
He woke me up at 3 am kneeling on the floor pissing and yelling, then he passed out and stole my comforter. I want a new roommate...
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
He sent me a meme at 3am. Usually guys just send me booty calls that late. I think I'm in love
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
Randomize
