This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
Why are there hooting douchebags outside my building? Did a sport happen again?
Took me 10 minutes of oral to finally get him hard for like 30 seconds of sex until he came and passed out. Def not worth the ROI.
Funny, 'cause his story is it went great. He faked passing out so he wouldn't have to do anything in return.
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
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