Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
nobody is as good of a wingman as me. i make whoever im with look like mark wahlberg during his underwear model phase
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
You can duct tape yourself to me so we dont lose you and you dont have to celebrate your birthday alone
I'm basically just sitting in the porta poTty finishing my bottle of champagne bc I am too lazy to carry it back to the tailgate
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
I sobered up and saw I was with the fat one and you had left laughing with the hot one. You're a terrible wingman, but an excellent manipulator
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
Day drunk. He was sitting in the back seat, opened the door, leaned out, and peed right there in the dutch bros drive through. No one even noticed haha
Randomize
