Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
Is there a card that says "Sorry I got drunk at your Christmas party and tried to steal your monogrammed hand towels so that I could give you something nice for Christmas"?
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
Mystery solved. Def had ice creme last night. There is a melted half eaten ice creme bar next to the bed. Which had melted onto my pillow. That explains why it was in my hair too. Im a fucking sherlock holmes over here.
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
Your penis caused this!
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
Randomize
