You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
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