whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
I woke up to a quacking alarm clock and a rando in my bed. I told him I liked his cargo shorts. Fireball is not my soulmate anymore.
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
Randomize
