You fell asleep mid BJ last night. I put your pants back on you. My ego is pretty bruised this morning.
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
Randomize
