Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
So we just accidentally broke into a building from the third floor while carrying shovels. The security guards are still very confused
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
he said "I would have fucked you in the chipotle bathroom" and I can't get over how awesome that would've been
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
I just got offered free tattoos if I smuggle some guns from OKC to Dallas for a guy in the hells angels
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