Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
My sister was not impressed when she got here. I was standing in the doorway in my underwear drinking a beer. At 2pm. On a Monday.
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
I woke up this morning to find myself laying in a beer puddle with "I'm sorry" written on the shaft of my dick and Nicole was nowhere to be found. Gotta love her
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
Randomize
