i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
Dude in the stall next to me shitting and sobbing. Dude another stall over, "Come on bro, you gotta loosen up." This is why I don't shit in public.
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
That Spanish guy who looks like Ben Affleck from that club we went to 3 weeks ago is still texting me.. He clearly doesn't remember what I look like.
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