i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
Randomize
