do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
last night i was so high that when a homeless person asked me for a dollar, i responded: dolla dolla bill ya'll.
At the doctor. They're doing a flu test now. He was like "where do you think you got this?" I said "bachelor party. Strippers." he goes "okaaaay I'll put 'other'."
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
Randomize
