Are you dead
Yes
Oh man
Someone fed me too many chicken nuggets and sexed me too hard
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
dude, it should not be this hard to find a bottomless mimosa on a friday morning
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
Randomize
