Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
You installed a beer holder in the shower?! You're the best roommate ever!
... That's a shower caddy.
I believe this is a toe-mate-toe vs. toe-maut-toe situation.
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
Never let me go online shopping while drunk. I now own 2 baby cribs. I have no children
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
Randomize
