I just saw the nastiest chick.
Where?
woke up next to her... fuck you jack daniels, fuck you
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
Do you remember calling yourself Captain Cockblock and openly giving out everyones sexual history? Because you did.
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
I'm gonna fight the coyote
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
Randomize
