he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
When you accidentally type "I want Prince William to fuck me in the ass" to your mom there's really no way to take that back.
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
He took a shit in my shoe. A part of me is livid and a part of me is impressed because that’s some real evil genius.
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