I felt like helen keller
But she could have totally found that shit before me
I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
She carried my bag of puke down the aisle and the flight attendant wouldn't move the beverage cart so she put the puke bag in the flight attendant's face and said "I have a bag of sickness!" I've never seen a cart move that fast.
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
Randomize
