You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
Ted is on HBO in 20 minutes...not sure if this or the drunken dance party I had at the bar to a N*SYNC Christmas song 20 minutes ago is the highlight of my week so far.
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
Randomize
