he is naked. in. my. bed. happiest day. of my. LIFE.
Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
Date with Air Force guy was nice btw. And for my next trick I'll talk him into fucking me in his fighter jet at 30,000 ft.
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Randomize
