I like how you formally end text interactions, just turn your phone off or don't respond you pervert
I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
I feel like a drive thru vagina
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
Randomize
