i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
You can duct tape yourself to me so we dont lose you and you dont have to celebrate your birthday alone
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
Are you aware that you called your mom to say hi before you dragged the random guy into bed last night?
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
Randomize
