she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
I knew I was in for a long night after I filled the empty pinata carcass with beer, bit off the top of one of it's legs and used it as a beer bong.
I just drunkenly accidentally had sex with my boss
Did you at least ask for a raise?
No but I am now the owner of one of either his or his roomate's teeshirts... Maybe I can use it to negotiate?
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
Randomize
