I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
plans for tonight: dress up like pirates, drink a bottle of mad dog and watch the sorostitues across the street get naked. and yes, the mad dog part is already in play. hurry the fuck up. i look like a loser doing this alone.
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
after you took your Demerol you started flying around and talking like the robot ship on the movie Stealth. then you licked my iPhone and declared the mission a success.
Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
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