he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
Drunk version of me is like a sleeping demon inside of me that awakes to the sound of vodka
Randomize
