3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall
I bet he comes in French.
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
It was literally me in an evening gown and him in a tux with six bottles of Vodka at Jons.
And this was for your brother's Christening?
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
According to the office gossip the new secretary is “a homewrecking whore”. Think I should spend $27 on a fake wedding ring?
Yes! Want that picture of you and my nephew?
Randomize
