It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
I was born with a shot glass in my hand
I think my mom's writing a book called how to fuck with your kids when you know they're high
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
Am I texting you while being used as a stripper pole by two half-naked women? hint: I am.
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
Randomize
