a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
coming down from speed on a 5 hour flight home from vegas is not a valid reason for calling off work the next day
so i said i had a yeast infection
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
How do I stop your cat from bathing me? I'm afraid she'll get drunk off my sweat
Randomize
