she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
Randomize
