I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
Drunk me wrote a bucket list last night. #4 is "hate fuck a childhood enemy". Can we make this happen?
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
I was just giving a mobile app demo to a client, on my iPhone, when a reminder alert appeared across the page blinking "12pm: go home and give John head". You're an asshole
Hahaha oops.
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
Birthday wine tasting got super shambly super quickly. I am covered in cuts/bruises/terrible life decisions.
Randomize
