Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
DONT TELL ME I CANT HAVE AN ENTIRE BOTTLE OF VODKA AT DINNER. IM AN ADULT. I PAY BILLS.
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
I really wanted you to make me eggs this afternoon. I even wrote it on my hand to remind myself.
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