Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
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