Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
I think I just was a dick to Paul Rudd.
Why did every guy I have ever slept with have to come into the library today?
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
On the verge of sleeping with a man who can take me to an early bird dinner and a movie with his AARP discount. YOLO
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
Just brought out that old CCM hockey helmet. The one covered in sharpie penises with "DRUNK BUCKET" written across the front. The number of tally marks / initials from tonight's drunk stunts alone is equal parts inspiring and alarming.
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
Randomize
