Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
Hey, dude, is Kevin still passed out on your porch?
Yeah. I'm gonna go leave a pitcher of bloody mary next to him in case he's still alive.
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
My dog just ran downstairs with my vibrator in her mouth... during my dad's birthday dinner.
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
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