Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
It's amazing how much jurassic park has contributed to my life recently
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
You were lost on foot. Texted us and told us that N*Sync couldn't save you, and then you "met Jesus" in your car.
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
Randomize
