he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
It was literally me in an evening gown and him in a tux with six bottles of Vodka at Jons.
And this was for your brother's Christening?
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
Randomize
