He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
I cannot start working out. If I start to look better, I'll ruin ugly women's chances forever. So, really...I'm doing them a favor...think about it.
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
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