# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
Somebody started a fire in the kitchen. I puked on it till it went out. The firemen high fived me.
Just spent a extra 20 minutes on the phone with the lady from unemployment talking about how to make the best brownies.
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
In retrospect i can confidently say that the last two months of our relationship... i was only in it because i didnt wanna lose my list on his netflix account.
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
Randomize
