We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
Thank you for letting me get drunk enough to forget he was there tonight, but not drunk enough to make a complete fool of myself.
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
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