Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
On the back of that comment, I've formed a theory that as a result of my brainwashing your drunk self actually believes that beards are your calling.
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
Randomize
