I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
Make me food? I don't want to be a science experiment. I'm dunk. Holy shit. Drunk*. Let's do science.
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
Randomize
