either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
Randomize
