You never realize just how much you have to be thankful for until you almost shit yourself in a Target.
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
I'm going to start referring to my liver is Livy. I feel like if I give it an affectionate nickname it will hate me less. Livy isn't ready for syllabus week.
I think we all know your liver needs a man's name.
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
Randomize
