I'm so excited for this wedding, I feel like a school girl about to get finger launched on the dance floor at the sadie hawkins dance
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
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