I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
Randomize
