well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
I'm not sure what's more surprising, the fact that she said I reminded her of Danny Devito, or the fact that it got me laid.
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
So now I can cross "have my ass be someone's phone background" off the bucket list. You know, if it was something I actually had wanted to happen.
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
Randomize
