i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
im just laying here pukin in my mouth and swallowing it 'cause im WAY too lazy to actually get up and find a place to vomit. this is my life now.
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
Randomize
