she was so not down for the gang bang
My 12 y/o god son's bandmate just asked me to their school dance. Still he's a better catch than the last one...
my mom walked in on me smoking weed alone, listening to the eagles, and just staring at the river. she totally knew.
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
...You tried to use your wallet to call her after you gave your cell phone to the cab driver as a "peace offering"
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
