Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
that's like... drinking popov and saying its the worlds best vodka. you gotta try some others first. THERE SHOULD BE A MISS AMERICA PAGEANT. but like, mr penis. and they can do tricks and make unintelligent remarks and wear sparkly condoms.
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
We're downstairs cleaning up and she turns to me with these big puppy dog eyes and says "Just so you know, I didn't have sex on your couch". You have to hug that.
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
Randomize
