Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
my house keeper must think I'm a prostitute.
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
You should have been there to see the look on her face when I told her that my dog gives better head than her. It was a beautiful symphony of shock, anger, and disbelief.
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
Tried to bribe the bartender with wedding cake. Felt bad for not giving her a tip.
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
