YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
Sacagawea was the original milf.
I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
Randomize
