You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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